I have always been a nerd.

As you can tell from reading this blog, I am not a very good writer.  I know this.  I am more of a reader.  As in, house full of books, always have one with me, go to bookstores when I am upset to keep me calm, kinda reader.  The super nerd in me loves books.

When I was a kid I was hooked on a book series, Sweet Valley High.  LOVED IT!  I would take my allowance each week and go buy a new book and lock myself in my room for a couple of hours until it was finished, only to wait until the next week when I could go get a new one.  AHHHH...the simple life!

I learned all of the life lessons that one 10 year old, overweight nerdy girl could learn from two hot blond, Southern California twins (Yes, I know, so realistic!).  I fallowed their drama, felt their pain and longed to have my very own cherry red Alfa Ramiro convertible.  Like a drug, I was hooked on these paperbacks and waited like a junkie for my next fix.

OH...and did I mention the Super Editions?  OMG!  I can't even tell you the excitement that came along with heading to the store and finding out that a new one was in. HAPPY BUTT WIGGLE DANCE to the 10th degree!  These came out around the holidays and always seemed to involve a ski trip or a vacation to Hawaii.  Heaven for the reader stuck in Oregon in the rain (yes, that would be me).

While cleaning the garage, I found my box of Sweet Valley High books.  Yes, I STILL have them.  I have almost the whole set. :SUPERGEEK:  No, I have not re-read them, and I hope that I have out grown that phase of my life, but it did bring back some memories.

Also in the box, tucked into one of the books, I found a letter from the author, Francine Pascal, in response to my one and only fan letter that I have ever written.  It was totally a form letter, sent out to all the pre teen girls that were followers, but I didn't care!  All that mattered was that I got a letter back in return!

It's true...I'm a girl. A mushy girl.

I am strong.  I am independent.  I am smart.  I always take care of myself.

THEN BAM--out of the blue all of that is out the window and I turn into a stupid mushy girl.

WTH?  How can this be?  How can I be all of the things listed above all at once?


I was minding my own business today and all of the sudden some random thought about a random forgotten person popped into my head.  WHY????  And now I can't clear my head of this person.  UGH. 

I hate being a mushy girl.  I see a trip to the store for ice cream in my near future.

I think I can. I think I can....or not

I'm depressed and in an overall funk.  Nothing that I have been doing lately seems to be working out and I need to fix this AND FAST.  This goth Tamara is no fucking fun.  I can't even seem to come up with a funny blog post and really, who wants to take the time to read a blog that makes you want to cry.  I DO NOT.


So, here is what I plan to do this weekend in the hopes that it changes my outlook.  And if nothing else, it will keep my busy so that I just wont think about anything.

I am going to workout.  Yes, it's been a minute since the gym and I have spoken, but I have an odd feeling that getting all sweaty will be a good thing. Maybe.
Finish cleaning my garage.  As with the gym, I kinda hate the thought of doing this, but just imaging how great it will look when it is all finished.  And the kids want to play pool.
Learn/try something new.  Yeah...no clue as to what, but I always feel better when my brain is working on something.
Finish up my costume. UGH.  This one is going to be hard as I still have no idea if I am really going to continue or not.  But I have an ass load of sparkly crap at home, so I must do something with it.


So...not a very long list or really a hard one, but my motivation to do anything other then sit on the couch is limited, so I will have to force myself to do it.

I might also need you, the reader, to keep me motivated as well.  Or at the very least call my lazy ass out if I do not get this list finished.

And I promise...this is the last depressing blog post! 

The Tassel Tales - Week four

It's Tuesday.

CLASS is tonight!!!

I think that I am going to miss it when it is done next month.  I will not have much to look forward to. Hmmm...


Anyway.  Tonight is about hair and makeup.  And neither one are my strong points.  Well, NOTHING concerning this class is a strong point, but this is high up there.  I am not really a hair and makeup kind of gal.  If I can get away with it, I am makeup free and wearing a hat...but that would not look all that snazzy on stage, so I will have to pass on that option.

Tonight I will also have another run in with my arch nemesis--the false eyelash.  They hate me.  I hate them.  In a perfect world we would just go our separate ways and never be bothered with one another, but this far from a perfect world. :heavysigh:

So, we shall see how tonight goes and with any luck, I can make it home after class without anyone that I know seeing me in my full face of clown :)  


Wish me luck!

Please don't ask me that question.

After a very long self imposed hiatus from hell...um...I mean the dating world, I recently went out on a somewhat pleasant lunch date with a guy we will call....Bullwinkle.

This post is not about the date or the dude, but the question that always seems to come up on a date that I just absolutely dread.

Bullwinkle "So, you have lived in Oregon all your life?"
Me "Yup"
Bullwinkle"So I guess you like to hike and camp?"

AAAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAAH!!!!!!!!!

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WHY?????

I hate this question!  I would rather talk about ANYTHING else.  Politics.  Religion.  The Great Pumpkin. ANYTHING!

I really do not have anything against camping and hiking.  I can, technically, do both.  I just can't say that I really enjoy them.
Come on...any of you reading this blog know that I am a bit....lets say....challenged when it comes to my ability to stay on my feet and not harm myself.  So taking me to the woods and asking me to climb up the side of some mountain while the theme to Deliverance is playing in the back round just does not seem like a good idea to me.  Or maybe it is the fact that whenever I have gone on a hike with some dude he turns into like super mountain man and feels the need to take me on the hardest hike known to man to show off or something.  Really?  Look at me.  Do you honestly think that hanging by your fingertips off the side of the mountain is going to win me over?  Show up at my house with a burger, then we will talk!
So when it comes to the topic of hiking, I can do it and I have, but only enjoy it if it is a REALLY easy hike :)

Then....we....come....to...CAMPING.  Um. Well.  It's ok.  I enjoy it, kinda.  But I am not one to just pack a tent in the back of my car and head out to the woods alone and cook food on a fire.  That just does not sound safe to me. AT. ALL!  So on the issue of camping, we will give that one a maybe, if I had the right company and just leave it at that.

I just don't see why I have to like these things just because I have lived here all my life.  We have perfectly wonderful hotels that have been here my whole life too.
How about we stay a weekend at the Benson and just call it camping?  I am ALL for that!      

My run in with gym dude

I dragged my sick self out of bed for one thing today--to join a new gym.
Oh yeah...just what one wants to do when they have been sick and really just want to die, but it needed to be done.  I don't have the kids this weekend and I really wanted to work in as many workouts as I could.
Um...can you tell I've had a fever for days?  When have I ever said I wanted to work out as much as possible???
Anyway, I got up and went to the gym.
Walked in and started my afternoon adventure with Gym Dude.

Ok...we all know Gym Dude.  He is the guy that works at the gym and when he is not working at the gym he is working out in the gym. The gym is his life.  He has a shirt that is a bit too tight as to show off his arms.  Owns only workout gear.  Talks a bit too loud.  Can't understand a joke.
Gym Dude.

He starts out with "HEY! What can we do for you today?"
Me "Um, just interested in the gym, maybe looking to join"
GD "OK-GREAT!  Lets look around"

Ok...this is where Gym Dude became my subject of ridicule.  He was like Speedy Gonzales on crack while walking around the gym.  I really have no idea what he said to me, and he was always 100 feet ahead of me.
Um...ok.

We went to go upstairs and he bounced up them like 4 at a time and gave me a look of pity when I went the normal one at a time speed.

Don't give me that look Gym Dude....I'll shank you.

So anyway, this went on for a while and he got to have 20 minutes of Gym Dude glory (showing of the gym and all)...I kinda tuned him out.

In the end, the gym was nice and since it just opened, it was cheap, so I joined.  Just hope that Gym Dude didn't really mean it when he said, "Can't wait to see you around the gym!  I will be on the lookout for you!"

Great Gym Dude....please wear a shirt that is your size next time.

Is it wrong that I dressed in all black?

I will not be grumpy.
I will not think about today as Valentine's Day.
I will not be sad.
I will not be snarky.
I will not feel lonely.
I will not cry.
I will not think about the fact that I did not even get a card ( you know how I feel about cards).
I will not play mushy love songs on my Ipod.


Oh, who the hell am I kidding?  I have done all of these things as soon as the clock hit midnight last night.
GAH.

You know what I have not done? 

Started drinking.

So to you my Valentine's Day flask, I say I love you!


Just kidding...I do my best not to drink at work....sometimes.