A house might land on me today...

I woke up in the worst mood ever.  Like so bad that I did not even stop for coffee as I had a feeling that some idiot in line in front of me would set me off for ordering too slowly.
That kind of bad mood.
Odd as I did not have anything happen to me and for once I actually got some sleep.

It is going to be a long day.  I am pretty sure that nothing is going to snap me out of this today so I should just keep my head down and stay away from people.

I really do not want end up on the news later for shanking a co- worker with a Sharpie...

Missed?

I miss people.

Well, not ALL people, but on the rare occasion when I have to end a friendship or cut someone out of my life, I miss them.  I wish I could be all bad ass and hard about it and say that I don't, but I do.

It's at that point when I start to wonder if they ever miss me too? 
Doubt it.

I am guessing that at that point, the other person is just happy to have me gone and I am (at times) a pain in the ass.

But it would be nice to think that maybe I am miss a little.

Just saying :)

I should come with instructions...

Someone once told me that they were trying to figure me out by reading my blog.  At the time I thought that was a silly statement, but after giving it some thought, it seems that statement is just stupid. 
It's a blog.
It could be all lies.

Well, not all lies as I don't work that way, but you can see how it could be.
The stuff that I blog about does happen to me.  Everything that I post is a part of my life. I am painfully honest and while not an open person by nature, the blog is used to vent and get stuff out into the open that if left just in my head, would probably drive me crazy.

But I still don't think that this a good way to get to figure me out. I think that can only be done face to face and possibly while enjoying an adult beverage or two.

But if you can't make it for the at drink and ever have any questions about me, just ask.   

Public Service Announcement

Girls--If you are out and you are drunk, please, for the love of god, DO NOT start licking the mustard bottle.  Even worse?  After licking the outside (YOU DO NOT KNOW WHO HAS TOUCHED THAT--JUST SAYING) you go on to actually EATING the mustard.  But not on anything.  Oh no...you just start dumping it in your mouth.

GIRL--THAT IS NASTY.  There was a whole basket of tots in front of you.  If your skinny drunk ass is THAT hungry-EAT THE TOTS!

Oh....and that evil nasty glare you gave me when I snatched your keys out of your hand?  Yeah, I know that was really meant to say, 'Thank you for not letting my sorry ass get pulled over by Mr. Police Man. Thank you Tamara!' 

**and yes, I do have photos**  :)

Oh, Statler and Kenny Rodgers- I LOVE you!

I have this friend, we will call her Statler.
Statler has this amazing ability that when she has made her mind up to do something, she does it.  No messing around.  She does it (whatever IT might be) 100% and never gives in.

This girl has the willpower of a monk.  She once gave up carbs for like...FOREVER.  Me?  I even think about doing that and within an hour I have eaten a whole chocolate cake.  (Don't judge. I eat my emotions).

What I admire most about Statler is her ability to cut negative people out of her life, and stick with it.
She is always telling me, "DELETE the number!.  Just do it!"
Me: "NO :winmpercry: I CAAAANNNNNN'T"
I am weak.  I have no clue how she does this. 
You know that Lady Antebellum song, the need you now one?  It does not even have to be me drunk at a quarter after one.  More then likely, it's like noon on a Tuesday and my sober ass is wanting to pick up the phone.  Statler would never do this!

I guess I am just an emotionally attached person.  And that is not to say that Statler is not.  She is (SHUT UP-you are!) and she has a huge heart, but she just *knows* when to shut the door on a not good situation.  She is like fucking Kenny Rodgers! She knows when to hold em, when to fold em and knows when to walk away.
So today (most days actually) Statter, I tip my ten gallon cowboy hat to you.  You are my self preservation idol.  LOVE YOU!     

Hey, Sad Tamara, GO AWAY!!!!!

UGH...this blog has turned into a place where I go to have my own little pity party.
HOW DID THAT HAPPEN???

I'll tell you how...

I forgot how to be me.  I let the crap that has been going on around me get into my head and change how I see things.

The world as I see it (ya know, the title of this blog) is usually seen though laughter and yes, some tears, but not the nasty sobbing ugly tears that have taken over my life!

Screw that!

So all the moms shun me.  So the other soccer coach wont even look at me.  So I am going to die single and alone.  So I failed at the burlesque thing.

So what!  At least I tried all of those things (well, not the moms...I thought about it and the Nooker can keep them.  Truth is, that group scares me!) and have some stories to tell about it.

And honestly, I have funny stories to tell about all of those things.  Stories that make people smile, even if it is at my pain, they still smile.

It has been way too long since anyone told me I was funny and make them laugh.

That is not the me that I want to be. 

Is everything perfect in my life? No, but is it ever for anyone?  Am I still heartbroken over the death of a resent friendship? Yes, but that is what makes me human.

I enjoy who I have turned out to be even if no one else knows what to do with me.

I AM BACK!!!!!

    

Random weekend fun

When Friday rolled around last week, I was bummed.  I really wanted to be a part of the Rosehip Review with a group of my burlesque sisters.  I had planned to be a part of this and then I got the news that Forrest's Grandfather had passed (I loved that old guy! He was the only person in the family that ever liked me.  Pretty sure it was due to the fact that we snuck him out of his old folks home and took him to drink gin martinis the first time I was in Dallas) and he needed me to take the boys on Friday night.  How can I say no to helping out my ex when there is a death?  Yeah...I can't.  So I spent Wed-Friday all bummed that I was missing it. And even more on Sat morning after reading all the great Facebook posts. SADFACE

But then I ended up having the most random and enjoyable weekend.
The following list is a mix of the random and enjoyable.

Hung out with the ex, his wife and his family for a bit at the Buffalo Gap
Got hit on by random odd (so not my type) single dad at the school carnival
Got a dog
Made my kids super happy
Helped out an elderly woman in need
Bowling
Trip to Spartacus
Sewed Tribbles
Timbers game
Smiles
Drinks
Laughs
Taxes


See....for the most part, none of those things were really on my agenda for the weekend and I am sure that many other things really should have taken their place and I am sure that I should have been more productive or something, but in the end, I had a pretty good weekend.  I love when the random works out in a good way and not in a I am going to cry myself to sleep sort of way.

I am still upset that I missed the show on Friday night, but there might be other shows.

How was your weekend?