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Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Oh, Statler and Kenny Rodgers- I LOVE you!

I have this friend, we will call her Statler.
Statler has this amazing ability that when she has made her mind up to do something, she does it.  No messing around.  She does it (whatever IT might be) 100% and never gives in.

This girl has the willpower of a monk.  She once gave up carbs for like...FOREVER.  Me?  I even think about doing that and within an hour I have eaten a whole chocolate cake.  (Don't judge. I eat my emotions).

What I admire most about Statler is her ability to cut negative people out of her life, and stick with it.
She is always telling me, "DELETE the number!.  Just do it!"
Me: "NO :winmpercry: I CAAAANNNNNN'T"
I am weak.  I have no clue how she does this. 
You know that Lady Antebellum song, the need you now one?  It does not even have to be me drunk at a quarter after one.  More then likely, it's like noon on a Tuesday and my sober ass is wanting to pick up the phone.  Statler would never do this!

I guess I am just an emotionally attached person.  And that is not to say that Statler is not.  She is (SHUT UP-you are!) and she has a huge heart, but she just *knows* when to shut the door on a not good situation.  She is like fucking Kenny Rodgers! She knows when to hold em, when to fold em and knows when to walk away.
So today (most days actually) Statter, I tip my ten gallon cowboy hat to you.  You are my self preservation idol.  LOVE YOU!     


  1. O.O




    I ... am honored beyond words. A whole post dedicated to moi!? And not one cursing me out for any of my many infractions but a *nice* one to boot! Thanks for that!

    Gotta say, for me the hardest part of life is making the decision, but once the decision is made, its dunzo and I'm all in. Its one of the better coping mechanisms from my childhood. :-]

    The lesson is this: if you're lucky enough to have the ability to cut a toxic person out of your life (as opposed to being *legally required* to deal with them on a regular), its a blessing and a damn-near-required owe-it-to yourself obligation to get rid of them!

    You do have a big heart -- but you gotta learn to protect it, child! Healthy living!

    Also: you're awesome.


  2. Did you notice that Statler and Kenny have matching eyebrows? Just saying.